Are you for real!? Do I have to buy this guy a Sharpie?
“Is this all for you today?” The cashier asks in the school bookstore as I put the writing utensil on the counter.
“Yep,” I say as I swipe my card.
As I walk out of the bookstore through the cafe, I see him picking out a snack.
“Hey!” Wow. He is so much taller than he seems when sitting across the room in Psychology. “This is going to sound really weird, but I felt like I was supposed to buy you a Sharpie.”
“I know, it sounds crazy. All right, bye!” I manage to say before running up to the student lounge and sitting in the back corner so as not to see my classmate again during this particular day.
A week later, this classmate joined me and some other friends at my table in the lounge, bringing quite a few of his other friends with him. These eventually became the people I hung out with during break every day. Because of my obedience, I was given the opportunity to listen to their life struggles, their hopes and dreams for the future, and to encourage and learn from them.
While I feel as if I should be overjoyed about the 2017 Spring Semester being over and summer break arriving, I am finding myself to be quite consumed with bittersweet emotions. Which is strange considering the craziness of this semester.
I wish I could say this semester was easy and fun, but unfortunately, it was not. I realized way too late that I had bitten off way much more than I could chew, with 14 credit hours of college classes (the most I have ever taken at one time), being on a robotics team, being a leader at youth group, and working close to 25/ 30 hours a week, it was so overwhelming.
Because of the overwhelming stress and inability to manage my time well, not only did my grades drop drastically, but I quickly sank back into my depersonalization/ depression, I had a major meltdown that resulted in me being grounded from my car for a week, a shattered phone paired with a dent in my bedroom wall, screams of: “I don’t want to live anymore,” and unsuccessful counseling sessions. Another meltdown that ended with four ping pong balls being destroyed in the church foyer was the catalyst in revealing to me that I can’t do this life thing on my own.
I began using my 45-minute drive to school as a time to hang out with Jesus. With worship music turned all the way up on a phone that sat in a cigarette box holder in a ’98 Ford Explorer, I experienced some of the greatest, verbal, two-sided conversations with God I have ever had.
I truly felt the joy of the Lord as He revealed to me my calling to bring peace and joy to my school. Walking into my 8:30 am class was no longer a time spent wishing I was still in bed sleeping, but rather an opportunity to smile and talk to people.
During the last two weeks of school, God called me to begin spiritual warfare in order to ban Satan from the concrete building that strongly resembles a prison; and man! Did breakthrough happen, even in such a short time period!
So, although I am happy for summer break and to no longer be required to write dull research papers, I look back on this past semester in awe of how amazing God is and how wonderful his restoration power is. This season in my life has been proof that our mess is no match for God and his calling on our lives.